hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
dude. I can hear the air.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
