that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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