I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
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