i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
