btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
