come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
