I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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