But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
