tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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