I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
