so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
