FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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