Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
