Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Randomize
