I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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