go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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