In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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