If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
