was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
