Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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