Say something about gay babies.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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