FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize