oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize