I puked a lego.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
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