I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Randomize
