ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
