the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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