just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
did i walk over a car last night?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
