dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
high people should be assigned attendants
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
