Define "chronic" masturbator.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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