Already got asked if we're dating
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize