I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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