did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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