my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
