Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
