is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
