So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
