Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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