David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
