I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
