Non-Jews are for practice
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
