Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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