Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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