there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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