I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
