He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
