I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
FUCK WHALES
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