have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
