You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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