he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I'm like, not good at living.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
