Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I just want to make out with him forever
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize